Praxis = PASSED!!

Last week I posted that I had registered for the speech praxis and was cuh-raaaaaaaazy nervous about it! Totally nerve-wracking experience, right?

Well, yesterday afternoon, I took it, and it took aaaaaaalllllll afternoon, but I am pleased to say that I PASSED!!!!! (I think!)

I have a few weeks to wait for the official report, but it appears as though I have certainly surpassed the passing score, and let me tell you, I was biting my nails the whole way through that test. (Not really, because testing center computer mouse germs, but you know exactly what I mean, right?)

So I can officially retire these here items, and move on to bigger and better things in life, mainly, a paycheck! Woohoo!!!!

See ya later, suckers!

One more life list goal officially checked off!!

Praxis Registration ...eeEEP!!

Big news over here! All I have to complete (other than a great deal of what feels like very unnecessary paperwork for state licensure purposes) prior to working full-time with a REAL ADULT LIFE PAYCHECK THAT'S NOT THREE-QUARTERS TIME NON-PROFIT PAY AT BASICALLY MINIMUM WAGE, is the Praxis for speech language pathology.

I am absolutely dreading this experience, as I tend to be a terrible test taker; however, I am planning to ace this thing on the first try.

Registration: Complete!

BOOM, BABY!!!

August 1st, here we come!

And again, I say it: "EEEEPPPPPP!!!"




Lots of prayers, crossed fingers, wishes for luck, firstborn children, or anything you have to offer to help me pass this exam or help settle my nerves or reduce my sky high anxiety levels are all welcome!

Taking Care of Business

This summer is FLY ING BY!!!

Oh my goodness, it's approaching the end of July! 😳

So here's what's happened this summer (not counting high school open houses or housewarming parties):

1. I worked like crazy in June to complete my oral boards to finalize my M.A.

2. That was complicated by a great deal of time spent in and out of the local Friend of the Court's office, as well as time spent on the phone with various employees and caseworkers, and police officers. Major parenting time snafu. Very nerve-wracking!

3. N. went to summer camp for the first time this year, for a day camp program. He loved it!!

4. Actually presented my oral boards.

5. Wrapped everything up in time for a great Independence Day celebration with friends and family, which brings me to the next one, a:

6. Visit from Uncle Slim, Uncle Fonzie, and Aunt Amanda.

7. A long weekend in the upper peninsula of Michigan, complete with several breakfasts over a campfire, and a boating expedition FROM HELL (more on that later).

8. Massive garage sale prep.

9. Notification of successful completion of my oral boards (one and a half weeks after I was told I would be notified- talk about Heart Attack City).

10. Crazy studying for the speech praxis.

11. Big time crafting. More on that later, as well.

12. And last but not least, gun safety class! Since I can't prevent my son from being around them at his dad's house (and he will be, and is already, and will probably be given his own gun WAY too early, like in just a couple more years here), I decided I had better know how the heck they work and how to use them and not use them. So that's done now.

13. And currently, anxiously twiddling my thumbs, waiting for N. to come back home from a one week vacation with his dad. It's his first time being away from me for longer than 72 hours (a weekend visitation followed by a 24 hour holiday), so I'm more than a little anxious. I'm sure he's having fun, but from past experience, I'm a bit worried about his safety. But I'm sure he's fine. Only 41 hours to go! Haha!

Then there are the things yet to come:

1. N.'s arrival back home.

2. Birthday party for two of N.'s friends this weekend. 

3. Bridal shower this weekend.

4. County fair next week.

5. The speech praxis, also next week.

6. A trip to the east coast for an actual decent vacation.

7. Setting up my workspace in each location (I'll be working in two separate locations, at least for the coming year).

8. The start of the work year.

9. Completing the paperwork to legally move N. and myself closer to my new job, as well as packing, organizing, and actually moving to a new home.

10. An out of state wedding that N. and I are both participating in.

11. Another bridal shower, sometime in August.

12. Another wedding, also out of state, that I am not participating in.

13. The Popcorn Festival.

14. A giant music festival/concert that I am most likely not attending, but may possibly attempt to swing.

15. A third out of state wedding, in which N and I are, again, participating.

16. A big party N. and I are hosting.

17. A marathon shortly before thanksgiving, and then:

18. Holiday season.

All of that along with figuring out everything new and job related, which I honestly won't have down pat until the entire first year is over. And probably even then, I won't have it figured out "pat" after only one year. It'll probably take far longer, but you know, optimism.

So that's what I've been up in the last four weeks, and what I will be up to for the coming weeks and months. I'm looking forward to some of it, and dreading other aspects. But I'll keep y'all updated and have a few other blog posts I'd like to complete in the meantime.

Thanks for coming back even after my radio silence for the last several weeks!

One/Thirty-six Questions

I recently discovered a news article discussing an experiment conducted in the 90's by psychologists, in which two individuals who had never met attempt to create feelings of closeness or intimacy by asking and answering a set of 36 questions face-to-face. Merely asking and answering three dozen questions

If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?

What role do love and affection play in your life?

What does friendship mean to you?

If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?

Those are a few of the questions that made the list of 36 questions to facilitate feelings of closeness between two perfect strangers in a period of an hour or two. I thought it would be fun to answer a few of them over the next couple weeks, and I'm going to start by answering the last question I mentioned now. 

When did I last sing to myself?

I honestly can't remember the last time I sang to myself. To be fair, I'm basically never by myself. I have a 3.5 year old who is glued to my side (meaning, I'm singing to him or I'm hearing "Stop it, mommy! Could you stop doing [singing] that?"), or I'm at the grocery store or the public library or someplace where people just don't want to look.sound crazy. When I do rock out by myself, I still tend to go for Johnny Cash or the Beatles, or any of the oldies stations. (I also can't really keep my mouth shut when I hear The Lumineers.)

When did I last sing to someone else?

A few hours ago! I always sing to N when I put him to bed. It's a very important part of our bedtime ritual. I sang the same couple songs every night (with a few bonus songs thrown in every here and there) to him every day since he was born, but for the last year or so, I've been taking requests. 😊

Tonight, N asked for a song about cars that crash, so I sang about a purple car named Alice, who met two cars named Howard and Horace one day while she was driving. They had bumped into one another with a big crash, but Alice was a careful car and did not bump into anyone. Instead, she found a tow truck to help Horace and Howard get to a garage to fix their bumps and dings. What a good Samaritan! It was a real winner, if I do say so myself.

Peace

I just wanted to share that I have been feeling overwhelmed and stressed out and just a little bit crushed by stressors and various aspects of my life that are outside of my control. Important, life-altering "stressors and various aspects of my life."

Tonight though, I'm feeling surprisingly at peace about it and wanted to share that feeling with the world. You know, as a reminder for tomorrow that I had that feeling today, so that I don't forget that the feeling of peace actually exists it, and I did, in fact, experience it in real life. :)

Where in the world lives Candace Sandiego?

M's topic: If you could move anywhere that you wanted to live, where would you go and why?

Good topic, following right on the heels of my Friend of the Court caseworker handing me paperwork for a change of domicile motion! (Not happening for a good long time yet, regardless.)

Also, it's a broad question so it's also a little difficult to answer. Anywhere I wanted to with no limits (financial, legal, et cetera)? Anywhere I want to in the US? Anywhere I want to in my own personal reality during the next 14.5 years? Specific location or merely city versus country?

Really, the only way I can answer this is with a whole slew of answers!

Okay. Here we go.

I'm a country person rather than a city person. I want to live in a beautiful, old rambling house somewhere with grass everywhere, a big, old barn, and a huge metal mailbox out by the road. Someplace with a giant yard, where I could play baseball in the yard with N, or capture the flag, or have our friends over during the summer for bonfires. Somewhere that N can grow up with the same values and some of the same experiences that I grew up with, even though he's down 4 siblings and a whole slew of cousins when compared to me.

It's also important to me, though, that we live in an area with close access to diversity, art, architecture, drama, sports, and music. We don't have to live in New York City (though that was on top of my list, pre-Magoo), but I want to at least live on the outskirts of a large town. I grew up in the country outside of Chicago, and had a lot of great opportunities to visit museums, dance halls, and ballparks in the city, while experiencing Lipizzaner shows, John Phillip Sousa Orchestra recitals, and university performances of The Crucible or The Pirates of Penzance in my hometown, all while living on 7 acres of field and yard, with ponies, dogs, rabbits, chickens, and cats in my backyard. That is something I greatly value for N and definitely want him exposed to as he grows up. Nothing but broad horizons for that kid!!

I would LOVE for N to grow up in my hometown. Particularly in my little countryside neighborhood.

Now.

Outside of my state (and outside of my 100 mile tether that accompanies joint legal custody), I would love to live in New York City. Not POSITIVE that I want to live there with a child though. But, the Catskills? That's another story. I'd love to be up there! Woodstock, people, Woodstock! No, just kidding, but seriously. The Catskills are beautiful and I think I love them. My sister and brother-in-law are lucky enough to have just had their offer on a house up in the Catskills accepted, so I, in turn, will soon be lucky enough to have plenty of time to visit them up there! I would also love to live in Tennessee. Again, in the country, maybe near Gatlinburg or Nashville, no too picky. I would, however, require a rocking chair on my front porch.

If I were to move outside of the U. S. of A., it gets a little tougher. Possibly Ireland? I have always been entranced by that country. Plus, no snakes? I have my doubts that's anything more than a myth, but I'm holding onto my dreams of a snake-free existence! My bucket list includes visiting Ireland with N.

Another potential home would be Italy, or perhaps Greece. Beautiful. Relaxing. Blue. My brain thinks those words/colors/thoughts/feelings every time Italy and Greece pop in there. Back in the days when I had cable television, I was entranced with HGTV, particularly house hunter shows in which the homes hunted were in Mediterranean regions. I loved the land, the attitude of the locals, and the crumbly homes they visited. It would be great to live in one of those places.

However, something I'm working on now, is being happy with my life as it is, regardless of my current location of domicile. Home is where your heart is! My heart is with Magoo. But someday I can move somewhere that makes me happier, and I can take him with me, can't I? :)

Sometimes I wish I was a poet..

M's topic: What's your favorite poem?

Secrets with Cam time- once upon a time I thought I was a total poet! (Read that with the same mental tone as if you were reading "a total bada**!") 

No, for real, I did.

I was going to write poetry and illustrate my literary genius so that I would become a world-renown children's book author. Sometimes, I still entertain this line of thought. Not kidding, dudes, I had a GREAT series of haikus about which you could never guess the topic!

Drawing from my childhood experiences, of course. 😁

Not only that, but my sister had this steno notebook that was full of poems she wrote, and I READ them. Oh man, she would have been super mad if she'd known that then. Not only did I read them, but (here's the kicker) I used one for my senior quote under my picture in my senior yearbook, thinking it would be funny. 

I'm still mortified.

Can't believe I did that. What a dope I am, you guys!

Not that I don't admire my sister and think she's ultra cool, but she wrote that when she was in high school and then I STOLE it, and oh my. Just. Oh my.

Anyway....

My favorite poem.

My favorite poem is absolutely "The Road Not Taken," by Robert Frost. I had to memorize a poem in 8th grade and recite it in front of my class, with a choice of three poems to memorize- a Robert Frost, "The Raven" by Edgar Allen Poe, and a third I can't remember and probably never will. "The Road Not Taken" was permanently imprinted on my memory and became something I automatically thought of and sometimes daydreamed about when hiking at the dunes or just outside enjoying nature. 

Without further ado, "The Road Not Taken," folks.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood 

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, just as fair

And having perhaps the better claim

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that, the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

-Robert Frost, the Man, the Legend 

I feel like that poem is a metaphor for my life (and probably 98% of the world's population could claim that as a metaphor for their life with the same right to claim it as I believe I have), although not necessarily in the most positive ways. The words do inspire a feeling of hope in me, however, which is always welcome, in my lofty opinion.

There have been others that come and go, but by and large, "The Road Not Taken" has my heart, and (I suspect) always will. 

Kind of like Gilbert Blythe. 😉

Oh, October, how I love you!

M's topic: What's your favorite season and why?

Fall, easy. 

Fall is my favorite season. And it's not autumn, it's fall. Calling it autumn makes it sound snobbish and self-important. It's not those things.

It's beautiful and cozy, crisp and crunchy, orange and red, wooly and bundley (yes, I know, not a word), snug and dry, clear and blue, swirly and scuttling...

Words that make me think of October make me happy. Because October makes me happy.

Corn mazes, hayrides, bonfires that make you feel as though you're melting on one side as you're freezing on the other side.

Seeing the clear, bright sky at night, filled with constellations that I still can't find without help, no matter how many times I try.

What's your favorite season?

Camping: The Greatest American Past-time❤️

M's topic: What's your favorite outdoor activity and why?

Camping!!!

Camping is my favorite outdoor activity.

Here's why:

1. It's outdoors. That's my favorite.

2. You sleep in a tent and listen to crickets and trees and grass at night.

3. You don't wear makeup.

4. You hike.

5. You feel relaxed. THE WHOLE TIME.

6. You can do all of your other favorite outdoor activities while you're camping! 

Play catch? ✅ 

Bean bag toss? ✅

Swim? ✅

Bike? ✅

Hike (again) ✅

Ladderball? ✅

Picnic? ✅

Sit around a fire at night? ✅

The options are endless. I can't wait to go camping again this summer.

7. You can do it: a) with your favorite people, b) alone, c) with 25 people, or d) with one other person. My favorite people to camp with are my son and my Bible study group.

8. I feel like I'm at home when I'm camping. It reminds me of my childhood, which was wildly happy. I would go back if I could, but I can't, so I go camping. 

9. No phones or alarm clocks. (Unless you're crazy.) ((Or you have a super exciting day trip planned.))

10. I feel like I need to say again that you feel relaxed the whole time. Sweet relief!!

And here's a picture of my favorite human, up early,
eating breakfast next to a fire, in his jammies.

I AM SO EXCITED FOR CAMPING THIS YEAR!!!

This afternoon..

And this is what N and I did this afternoon.

Such a perfect day. 😊

That grad school life...

I've not blogged in 3.5 weeks. I've been too busy, too stressed, too anxious! The last 3+ months have been exhausting and draining and just straight up difficult.

My graduate program boards were in January and I spent December and January studying, but missed passing by two points on my written boards. My oral boards were shortly after, after which I was put in "on hold status." I spent February and March jumping through countless hoops and writing papers and re-attempting my oral board, only to learn in late March that my panel determined I would not be allowed to remain on track for graduation and instead would have to retake my boards during a different semester. 

Suckerpunch.

Follow that with a bunch of negative, mean, hurtful text conversations with Magoo's father, in which some carefully aimed barbs that were intended to do maximum damage to my self-esteem. 

Double suckerpunch.

I have done a lot of griping and complaining, both alone and to my ever so patient friends and family who have listened and supported and prayed for me throughout this entire time.

The love, support, and prayer has been felt though. I am thankful for my graduate program friends, my Bible study, work friends, family, and even new friendships that have just developed since this semester began.

I know that God has a plan for my life and everything happens for a reason. It is hard to let go and trust that, but with a little help, I've been letting go a little more and a little more, and trusting in His will and His plan.

I'm choosing to take a positive outlook on life, rather than getting caught up in the disappointments. 

Today a book I ordered was delivered. It's a devotional that accompanies a book called One Thousand Gifts, by Ann Voskamp. I plan to read a devotional each day, focusing my thoughts on the gifts and blessings of each day, big or small, rather than focusing on dark obstacles that may seem at first glance to obscure the light. 

In the past I have created my own lists of "one thousand gifts," but have never continued it long enough to truly make a habit out of looking for and appreciating the tiny shining moments in life.

I pray I will remember to put God first and trust in his will. I pray that I will be thick skinned for future hurtful conversations (of which there will undoubtably, and unfortunately, be more), and I pray that I will see the light and beauty and blessing in every moment, even in the moments that feel painfully dark. 

Praise to the Lord above from whom all blessings flow.

I thank Him for everything and all that I have and am.

Fit to Fat to Fit

M.'s Topic: What are your thoughts on the concept of fit-fat-fit?

I think M likes it when I get riled! 😉 (I'm going to try not to though.)

So when M was deciding my topic for this week, she asked me if I had ever heard of the show "Fit to Fat to Fit." I had a vague memory of it, which I believe was actually her mentioning a commercial she had seen for this new, unusual fitness/makeover/new you/weight loss/exercise show, which she confirmed I was correct about. 

Now, I've never watched the show, so I'm not fully informed of the methods by which this was done, but I doubt my opinion would change much if an extremely informed person were to extremely inform me that I was way off on my thoughts of this, AND my understanding of the participants methods. 

But here's how it works: 

Very fit fitness coaches spend several months gaining weight. This must be done in an unhealthy way- I can't imagine there's any way to gain a ton of weight quickly and still be healthy about it. That's strike one. Really, that's actually all the strikes. And I consider that to be many, many, many strikes.

It's actually a novel idea to have weight loss fitness coaches losing their (over)weight right alongside their clients. The idea is (other than the opportunity to come up with a new reality show to make a whopping lot of money from) that having the same starting point as their clients enables them to relate to their client. 

While that seems cool in theory, it seems very superficial. Like, six pack-spray tan-bleach blonde hair superficial.

Those in professions that work with other individuals should certainly be able to build rapport with their clients/patients/students/what have you, without compromising their physical systems with the shock of rapidly gaining far too much weight and then turning around and trying to drop all of it. There is simply no way this can be healthy.

The other thing is that while it's a huge shock to their system that no one in their right mind (with a health and fitness background) should do, it's also demonstrating very unhealthy choices to past, current, and future clients. Not just their clients, but everyone who sees or hears about the show! 

It may be an interesting show, and I can see where the clients/coaches may feel closer and possibly more motivated in this kind of situation, I am completely, totally, without a doubt opposed to the idea of fit-fat-fit.

Just be kind, motivating, creative, supportive, hard working, loving, caring, weight lifting, walking, jogging, dancing, swimming, balancing, laughing, smiling, hydrated, 80/20-healthy-to-unhealthy diet ratioing, empathizing FRIENDS, and do your best to walk alongside your clients without compromising your own dang health, folks!

And now, excuse me while I carefully step all the way down the staircase from my soapbox.

Be healthy, y'all.

Road Trip Tips: 10 Things I Learned from Experience

M's Topic: What have you learned about traveling - good and bad?

Growing up, my family vacations consisted of road trips and camping, I did it as a single adult and with college friends, and I've also traveled long distances in a car alone with my son. Since road tripping is kind of my thing, that's what I'm going to go with here.

1. Make sure you like the people you're traveling with, before you commit to hours and hours in a vehicle with this person. Not only do you travel in close quarters when road tripping, remember that frequently you are stuck with this person once you arrive at your destination, as well. This isn't always the case, as sometimes your destination allows you to split up and do your own thing before traveling home (or figure out a different way to travel home, Lord willing); however, the biggest piece of advice for choosing your travel partners is to know them very well before you even hypothetically start talking about a trip.

I made this mistake once in college and spent a week on vacation with a person that I had only known for about a month. You know how it is in college, where you only know someone for 2 or 3 weeks, and it feels like a million years? Well, it's not a million years! Don't fool yourselves!

It was a terrible experience. It was a terrible experience for me and for the people we were visiting. I can't imagine that it was a good experience for my travel-mate. Do not make this mistake.

And be realistic about what you (and they) can handle, personality-wise, prior to making arrangements for a trip.

2. Be flexible. Do not plan to road trip if you have to have a rigid schedule and can't alter it by even 15 minutes. I've heard of those people, and they scare me!! The point of road tripping isn't just the destination. Sure, you want to get there, but the point of it all is the journey! Enjoy the sights. Stop, stretch, go to a zoo, eat a pizza in the middle of some random town. Do something! Flexibility is important regardless of your travel mates, be they friends, spouses, siblings, college friends, toddlers.

My roommate and I made another trip during college with a third friend, and I would like to publicly compliment them on their ability- nay, their incredible level of achievement of flexibility in travel plans! We knew our ultimate destination, we knew what day we wanted to arrive there, and aside from a few other vague details, everything else was subject to change as we desired.

Stop at a beach to check for pirate ships, for gosh sake!

My roommate also looked ahead to check out some details for specific regions, in case we had time to kill in any particular region, which leads me to the next piece of advice.

3. Do a little research ahead of time. That's kind of opposite to the bit about being flexible, but it's pretty smart to do anyway. Don't set a rigorous schedule, just come up with basic ideas so that you can either throw them with the wind later, or have great ideas to enjoy your time wherever you are!

Now I'm all for tourist attractions, but look for the off the wall things to do, too! Whether it's visiting a local park, a goat farm, a national monument, a guided tour, or a clambake, check out what each area has to offer before you head out.

By "do a little research ahead of time," I also mean "do have a backup plan ready to put into use if the kinda-not-super-confirmed overnight stay at a campground in the backwoods of Alabama doesn't turn out to be an actual place to camp." Otherwise, you might end up sleeping here, like we did on this fateful trip.

We definitely surprised these guys when they rolled into church on Tuesday morning in their suits and found us sleeping in their parking lot. 

4. Organize your packing by the day. I learned this after years of digging in frustration through my bags, and ultimately coming home with more unworn clothes than dirty. I do this when I'm traveling on my own, even for a one night trip, and I especially recommend doing this if you're toting kids! I don't just mean write a list out of the things you want to wear on each day.

In theory, you should never have to deal with this again when traveling, if you follow this packing system. 

When I pack my son's clothes, I put each night's pajamas and the following day's clothing in a gallon ziploc bag, and then I label the bag with the day that it's going to be worn. That way, I don't have to dig and dig in a huge duffel bag for lost socks or try to match outfits while I'm traveling. This is especially helpful during late night arrivals, as I can just grab the ziploc labeled for the next day, and in it I can find the pajamas I need to put on my son that night, along with the clothes he'll wear the next morning.

Toiletries are also packed into baggies, with dental hygiene items packed into a small baggie, shower items packed into a second small baggie, and both of those dropped into another gallon ziploc.

All I need to grab out of my car are my child and my purse, toiletry ziploc, and clothing ziploc, all of which (except the child) can be tossed into one small over the shoulder bag. It pays to simplify your packing in this way! Requires a little more organization ahead of time, but it is SO WORTH IT.

**I also always pack at least one back up set of clothes for my son, and toss it in the back of the duffel bag. Common sense for moms, but still. It also helps prevent overpacking! :)

5. Give yourself a travel allowance ahead of time, and stick to it. I'm so bad with this. When I travel, I just spend away, and cross my fingers that I'm not running out of money.

On the other hand, I don't go on extravagant vacations, so when I spend money, I'm talking a ferry tour of a lagoon (Creature from the Black Lagoon status!), a zoo visit, meals, and not a whole lot of other expenses besides gas or maybe one night in a hotel. I also like to tent camp, which is a hugely exciting adventure for the little kiddies, and a big money saver for the big mommies. Win-win!

In other words, I'm not going crazy with my money here. Still, I don't plan a budget for my trips, and that's something I always plan to change with each trip. I would recommend building a budget, and sticking to it as closely as possible, but also keeping an extra $200 or so on the side for emergencies, or for leeway if you're a spartan budget builder!

6. Stay with a local. I know this isn't always possible, but my best trips included staying with someone from the area, or traveling with someone who has some kind of connection, even if they're not actually from the area I'm visiting.

For example: You get a fun trip out  to see this osprey with your friendly neighborhood tour guides! 

First of all, it cuts back on the stress of being alone in an unfamiliar place. Even if that's not a situation that stresses you out. Things like that don't bother me, but as a single mom, there is a bit of security knowing that there is someone in the region that you can rely on if something crazy happens.

If you're staying in someone's home, it obviously has the benefit of being cheaper than paying for a hotel room each night. The added benefits include people to socialize with, security in being with people, the ability to eat in instead of eating out for every meal, and the knowledge that person has of their community and it's lesser known attractions!

My roommate and I stayed in the home of her family friends in the Florida panhandle, and we were introduced to a lot of places we would never have known existed without them telling us to check it out. It was a lot of fun, and definitely something that I appreciated.

7. Try the local cuisine! Even if it sounds gross or a little more hillbilly than you've ever had, still give it a try. Chances are slim that you'll have the opportunity again for quite a while, and don't you want to say you tried it?

Now, that said, don't break your budget on one meal!! My roommate and I were very thrifty on our road trip to Florida, and as such, we considered it worthwhile to have dinner at an extremely expensive restaurant to celebrate our friend's birthday. I have never had another meal as expensive, but it was quite an experience and worth it for that trip.  Plus, we had saved money prior to our trip specifically to designate to that experience.

I have not since gone to another restaurant that expensive, nor do I plan to do so any time in the near future (and most likely not any time in the distant future, either). There are always ways to get the same experience for less- you don't have to eat at a famous restaurant just to have a food that an entire region is famous for providing. You can have the same food prepared at a place more frequented by locals, and probably for much less than the tourist attracting famous restaurant. Now, if you want to be able to say you ate at that restaurant, go for it. Suits me not to for the most part, though!

8. Fill up on gas before you need to fill up on gas. This may sound obnoxious or inconvenient to you, as it means stopping for gas a little more often than you'd like to, but one thing you definitely don't want to have happen is running out of gas on the side of an interstate. Or on the side of only God knows where on some back road in a state that is not yours.

I went on a road trip about a week after buying myself a new car, and realized on the trip back, at 5:00am, about an hour and fifteen minutes away from home, that I was on empty. I wasn't familiar with the car and so didn't realize how soft the ding was to alert me that my gas tank was low and it also hadn't occurred to me yet that my gas gauge was obscured from my view by my steering wheel when I had it adjusted properly for myself.

The next exit with a gas station sign turned up a gas station that was closed for business, and when I got back on the toll road, I made it another fifteen minutes on the road before my car sputtered to a stop. Thank goodness I was close to home, so someone arrived with gas at 6:00am while Magoo slept away in the backseat. If the same thing had happened, and I hadn't been near family and friends, it would not have been a good situation, with semis roaring past, rattling my car, while I sat on the side of the road in the dark with a sleeping two year old.

Lesson learned: Don't get low on gas!!

9. Travel during the time the kids are most likely to be asleep. Obvs, this tip is for those with children, or who have the luck of traveling with friends who have children. (I'm looking at you, M!) When my son was an infant, it wasn't such a big deal, but I also wasn't traveling more than two hours away from home during that time. In fact, I don't think we traveled longer distances than two hours until Magoo turned two.

At any rate, I have found that the trips are best when Magoo is asleep for the duration of them. Sucks to be the grownup in this case!! When making a six hour trip, I shoot for leaving just before Magoo's bedtime. When making a 10 hour trip, I try to leave just before Magoo's afternoon nap time. This way, in each case, he falls asleep within an hour of leaving home.

If we leave before nap time, Magoo takes a long nap, wakes up, finds some fun and exciting toys that he isn't allowed to play with when he's at home (or, on one trip, a portable dvd player that I borrowed from a mom friend - thank you) and he's super excited to be in the car with these things. After playing with the fun-and-exciting toys, we eat dinner (sometimes just snackie things, which is also a super exciting novelty to N), and then he's ready to play with the fun-and-exciting toys again OR watches a movie.

Next, he's out for the night. So easy.

This travel plan ultimately allows for me to arrive at my destination anytime between midnight and 2:00 am, which works great for me, as N sleeps all night, isn't crazed from being in the car and bored all day, and I still get a couple hours of sleep that night.

You just have to figure out what works for you, and make it work. This is my current favorite option.

Disclaimer: That worked great when he was in diapers. I'm not so sure how the next long distance trip will work, now that he's in undies, but we'll make it work.

Second disclaimer: I also haven't driven farther than 12 hours with him, so if that were to happen, I would obviously have to adjust my travel plans in some way to prevent me from driving until 4:00 am.

10. Have fun! Everything can be fun. Even if you're miserable at butterfly garden, try to see it from the point of the view of the person that suggested it and that was crazy-out-of-their-mind-excited about the prospect of visiting a butterfly garden. This is hard to do as a child, but the people reading this are adults, and can totally do it. Give a little, get a little.

Allow others to do the things that excite them, and share their excitement. Even if you don't really, still give it your best shot, and you may find yourself actually enjoying your time! You certainly want others to do the same for you, and your travel mates will have more fun with you during activities that they're less excited about, if you are a good sport during activities that you are less excited about.

In other words, be a good travel mate, yourself. And enjoy your trip!

Oh, and a freebie: When at a beach in Florida in early April, wear more sunblock than you think you need! AND DON'T FORGET TO APPLY TO ARMPITS AND THE BACK OF KNEES. Just take my word for it. You don't want to learn that lesson through experience.

How Many Kids Do YOU Have?

One of my coworkers at my current internship is the mother of seven children. We recently had a conversation about kids, parenting, and society, and she told me that 80% of the time, the response she receives from people who have just learned she has a family of nine is either negative or downright rude.

"Oh, I'm sorry!"

"You have how many kids?!"

"So you don't believe in birth control?"

I had fewer siblings, but still more than any of my friends growing up. There were five kids, which equaled a family of seven. I never knew the kinds of comments my parents received for having five kids, until I became a parent myself. Though my son is an only child, I had originally hoped for him to have two or three siblings. When I told my mother that I wanted for N to have a couple brothers or sisters, or both, she talked about her choice to have a "big" family, and that's when I learned the things that both friends and total strangers said to my parents.

"You have how many kids?!"

"Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"Do you know how that works?"

Here's the deal, people. While I'm the first one to admit that 19 Kids and Counting freaks me out (when parents start assigning parental roles to other children due to sheer numbers overwhelming them, such as requiring siblings to pay other siblings to "chaperone" dates, that's just too much), who are we to judge? 

I have one child. I'm a single parent now so I'm not in a good situation to start adding new children to my family. Is it right for families with 2+ children to start judging me because I only have one child? They may think my son will grow up to be super spoiled (it's very possible - he's the only grandchild or niece/nephew on my side of the family, plus I see myself going overboard sometimes because I don't want him to miss out on anything that kids in two parent home may have, although I've been actively trying to reel myself in a bit), and that their children will be better balanced since they will have siblings to have to learn to live with. That may be true. But they aren't in my situation.

Should I judge them for having more kids? Because the greater amount of kids in their families means it's impossible for each child to have the amount of love, care, attention, and protection necessary for them to grow to become well balanced adults, right? Parents of four or more kids can't be adequate parents to all of their kids. No way.

Or maybe having big families is healing. Who am I to judge anyone for making those choices in their lives? 

Everyone should be allowed to make their own choices in their lives, whichever ones are the best decisions for them. If a person believes they are in a good position to have a family (and I don't just mean a good financial position, I mean if they feel they can do it, and they know they will do what it takes to be good parents), why shouldn't they choose to have a kid, or five, or seven?

Think about what's best for you, for your partner, for your existing child/children, and what's best for any future child/children, and make the right decision after considering all the factors. For that matter, don't have kids if you believe it's not the right decision for yourself. 

Point is, don't judge others for their choices, and don't let others do the same to you.

Just do what you believe is best for you and your family.

Celebrities!

Okay.

Departing from my typical "I'm all about me and no one else" kind of blog post, I'm writing about other people today. (But don't be fooled, it's still all about me and no one else, if you keep reading. Wow. I'm just not very philosophical or world-minded, am I? Rats.)

I've come up with a short list of my favorite celebrities, and am sharing them for the fun of it, so here they are.


1. Actress I most want to be friends with!

Jennifer Lawrence
(She just seems so down to earth and funny! My kind of person.)

2. Actor I would marry in a split second/have a giant, girly crush on.

Hugh Jackman
(Woosa! I just love his face!!)

3. Actress I think takes the cake for the beauty award.

Audrey Hepburn

4. Most adorably geeky actor.

David Tennant

5. Favorite comedian.

Jimmy Fallon
(He grew on me in the last 4 years.)

6. In keeping with my girl, boy, girl, boy trend, next is my favorite female comedian.

Tina Fey
(She definitely does the best impressions I've ever seen!)

7. The classiest gent ever to grace Hollywood.

Cary Grant

8. And she wins the classiest woman ever to grace the screens of Hollywood, as well.

Audrey Hepburn

Who are your favorites?

Juicing?

M's Topic: Your opinion on juicing. Are you for it? Have you ever tried it?

Here's the deal on this one. I wasn't sure what M was talking about when she gave me this topic, so I needed a little clarification.

"Like putting vegetables in a juicer to drink them instead of eating them?"

"Yep."

Here are my views on that.

I'm currently a speech language pathology graduate student. SLPs provide a wide variety of therapies, including dysphagia, or swallowing, therapy. So, if people have difficulty eating certain consistencies, we teach them strategies so that they can eat those consistencies. Or we determine which consistencies are safe for them to eat if the strategies are not appropriate for them. In other words, a large part of the scope of practice includes helping people eat from as many consistencies (thin, nectar thick, honey thick liquids, puree, mechanical soft, soft, and regular solids) as possible to have a full quality of life.

Therefore, I think people who limit their nutrition to JUICE are insane! No matter the length of time, be it one day, one week, or forever. We were born with the capability to develop teeth, for a reason. Our bodies need more than just the nutrition remaining in the juiced fruits/vegetables/what have you. We need protein and fiber, which will be lacking after juicing. Protein helps us maintain muscle and keeps our metabolism going, and we all know how important fiber is! Our metabolism will be compromised AND we'll be our weaker selves!

Ultimately, a juicing diet will lead to fatigue, blood sugar spikes, dizziness and headaches, and our appetites won't be satisfied. If we can't satisfy our appetites, we won't even stick to the diet anyway.

What's the point?? It just seems like misery to me.

I say no to juicing!!

If I have an hour to myself...

My church has a secret prayer partner program set up, in which ladies can choose to participate. They sign up, and upon signing up, fill out a form indicating some of their favorite things to do, read, et cetera. The forms are then distributed out among the women, and secret prayer partners assigned. For example, if I receive Judy McFinnerson's form, I am her secret prayer partner and I take it upon myself to gift her with various little items, cards, birthday and anniversary gifts, and daily prayers throughout the duration of the year. Then at the end of the year, there is a little party in which all of the women share who they've been praying for, and everyone feels nice and good and happy.

This year, the form that I filled out asked this question: "If you had one hour completely to yourself, what would you do for that hour?"

I think I said that I'd read. I had approximately 27 seconds remaining to complete the form and have it ready to hand over with a smile on my face to one of the most intimidatingly overbearing and no-nonsense women in the church, so I didn't put a lot of thought into what I was writing.

But. In real life, when I have more than 27 seconds to answer 14 questions.

I'm torn between two scenarios I have playing through my head. In the one, I'd cram as much as humanly possible into that one hour block of time. (Softball game, horseback ride, bike ride, picnic, see Troy and Da Vinci in a time-traveling spaceship, with all of my friends around me.) In the other scenario, I can see myself falling asleep in a tent in the woods, all alone, listening to the sounds of the woods. In the first, there's so much interaction and fun and movement, and in the second, just silence and peace.

I'm not sure what I would do. It probably wouldn't be read! I'd save that for when I have more than an hour to myself.

2016 Bucket List Goals

M's Topic: Do you have a bucket list? What one thing from your bucket list will you make sure to accomplish this year?

Yes!

I have several things to accomplish this year from this list of buckety items I have compiled in years past!

Here are a few of the things from my bucket list that I want to accomplish this year:

1. Learn yoga   --> Not even sort of done.
2. Run a marathon (Scary goal!)   --> Marathon selected, partners convinced, registration not completed, training NOT COMPLETED.
3. Receive my master's degree in communication sciences and disorders.    --> Accomplished, July 2016! Goal: 
4. Learn how to change a tire.   --I need to work on this one.
5. Have my annual family photoshoot with N.   --> Accomplished, May, 2016! Goal: 
6. Sign N up for summer swim classes.   --> I missed the boat with this one, this summer. :( 
7. Complete grad school with honors   --> You know, I don't know or care if I completed with honors. I felt honorable enough, managing to not drown in the last 3 years.  July, 2016, baby!!! Goal: 
8. Visit all 50 states with N. (Obvs, I don't plan to accomplish this in full during 2016. The plan is to check a couple states off the list.)   --> In progress!
1. We made it to the U.P. for a quick vacation in early July. 
2. We're visiting NY, PA, IN, and hopefully MD and TN by November!
9. Wear dresses more often.  --> In progress, but I could really twist my arm and get a few more dresses out of this summer! Still, Goal: 
10. Build a sandcastle with Magoo.   --> We've built few sandcastles, but filled MANY buckets with sand. I'm okay with this. Goal: 

My First Kiss

When I was in 8th grade, I was "dating" this really cute guy in my class. I put it in quotes, because by dating, I mean I had a giant crush on him, I assume he had a giant crush on me, he sat at my table during lunch, we held hands in the hallway, and he opened doors for me. I don't recall us ever actually going anywhere together. Although I may have gone to his house for his birthday party? Anyway, I really liked this boy. I mean really.

In eighth grade, he tried out for the school track team (and I use the words "tried out" lightly- if you went to my school and you tried out for something, it means you were on the team (although he was an extremely talented runner, so he would have made the team, no matter how enormous of a school he attended)). So, spring rolls around and he joins the track team (we were steady by then, we started dating in the fall, and this was late May or very, very, very early June). I want to be a good girlfriend (after all, he always held my hand in the hallway and opened doors for me), so I decide I'm going to his track meet!

I remember going to the track two or so hours after school was released for the day, and that it was kind of cool, but not too bad. Like the kind of cool where if you're running around, you'll get warm with a light jacket on, but if you take it off, you won't really be comfortable. The air is cold, but the sun is warm, you know? It was nice outside.

My dreamboat (haha) ran distance and middle distance, so he ran some of his events, and I watched him all proudly. (You guys, this was my boyfriend.) In between his events, he'd come racing over to me in the mid-field (not much of a bleacher for the middle school track, you know- all of the parents and siblings and friends and coaches and teammates all mingled together in the middle of the track) and we would giggle and say stupid things and flirt, and then he'd go run another event, and then come back all sweaty and stinky so we could giggle and flirt some more.

I remember that my dad was coming to pick me up that night, because I had a softball game or practice or something that I had to run home to change for, so I told my "special friend" that I had to go. And...

My sweaty, smelly, sweatpantsed, handsome, hilarious, lovely, DREAMBOAT boyfriend, leaned in and stabbed me on one corner of my mouth with his lips.

You. Guys.

I.

Was.

Over.

The.

Moon.

I was all, "He LOVES me!!!"

And, "We're going to get MARRIED someday!!!"

And, "He LOVES me!!!"

So I gave him a giant hug and I raced out to the parking lot, and I'm pretty sure I was beaming all night long. I got my first kiss, and it was from the cutest boy I knew! I could feel my little I'm-afraid-to-kiss-you-and-I'm-14-years-old kiss for hours. In fact, when I woke up the next morning, I could probably still feel my kiss, right there on the corner of my mouth, waiting for me to wake up and remember it.

Honestly, I wouldn't trade it for anything. It's one of my favorite memories. :)

Ten Things I Believe

1. I believe in God, Jesus Christ, and the Bible.

2. I believe a person may not remember what you said to them or did to them, but they will always remember how you made them feel.

3. I believe we should treat everyone as we would like to be treated.

4. I believe honesty, integrity, kindness, and respect are some of the most important characteristics a person can have.

5. I believe that the world is a beautiful place.

6. I believe in chances.

7. I believe in self-love.

8. I believe in my family.

9. I believe in N.

10. I believe in me.

My Why

M's Topic: What's your why? Why do you do what you do?

This topic's sort of killing me this week. I keep pulling up my blog, staring at the topic, and closing things down again. And I guess the reason for that is because I don't really have a why. When I was younger, I did what I did because I didn't know what else to do. Kind of like, "just pick something already and get on with it."

Instead of doing things just for the heck of it, I'm doing them for the heck of it while in survival mode. I have to support my son, and myself, and eventually get my life together well enough that I can provide my own source of food and shelter, so that my parents can get on with their lives, as well. This effort that you see me put forth is pure desperation, folks! ;)

I can't offer much else on this topic, at least for now, but take what I've got for what it's worth!

What was I doing on this day, 10 years ago?

Ten years ago.

February 2nd, 2006.

I was a junior in high school. I was thinking about cutting my hair short. I had just decided to try out for a school play for the first time ever (I had only ever worked backstage, but this time it turned out that I missed auditions by one day). I was still crying my eyes out from breaking up with my high school luuuuurrrrrve. I was returning college junk mail with my "sign me up for more junk mail from your university, please" information all filled out. I was signing up to graduate from high school a semester early (I just couldn't keep coming to school every day with my luuuuurrrrrve now that he hated me! -read with a dramatic flair-). I was babysitting a ton. And working at Four Season's Video. I was doing my best to stay out of the way of the planning for my oldest sister's wedding. And racing around in my little, seventh-hand, smoking, stinky, 1992 Ford Taurus. I still slept with my pound puppy, a gray poodle named Bonnie. I had my own little dog, Mac, who was just a little guy, 2.5 years old, and my grumpy, old-man dog, Roy. I was considering becoming a CPA. I was listening to Johnny Cash and the Beatles, daily. I thought I was pretty cool. Not much else was going on. I was in high school...

Stress Relief

M's topic: What's your favorite stress reliever?

This is a hard one for me! I am always stressed, and even when I'm taking a break from all of the hard things in life, I'm still holding that stress somewhere. When I'm at a friend's house, when I'm playing with the kiddo, when I'm out for a walk in God's glorious nature..

It's in the back of my head. No matter how hard I try to let it go. But here are some things that help.

~Spending time with friends

~Putting puzzles together with N

~Playing catch (especially when you hear a solid smack of the ball in the webbing of your mitt)

~Eating a burger (I KNOW that's terrible!!! But if you get a good one, it's so delicious that you forget what stress is while you taste the goodness that comes between two slices of bun!) ((And I'm totally serious about this one, though you may think I'm crazy!))

~Reading a book

~Moving (my body, not moving to a new home)

~Traveling

~Sometimes painting. Sometimes it stresses me out more though, because I'm a perfectionist.

~Building things. It's so therapeutic. I like to see my hard work has actually resulted in something that's tangible.

~Biking really fast

~Driving in the heat with the windows down

~Swimming

~Watching a good movie

~Attending high school basketball games

~Getting a massage

~Snuggling N

~Bible study

~Almost anything with N, actually

Yep. Any of those things are just grand. And there are more.

^^ Stress = Relieved

One Thousand Gifts

My cousin sent me this picture a couple days ago:

by Brian Andreas

Cute, right? Only things have been the pits for me lately, and I've noticed something about myself. I used to be super chipper and positive and optimistic and I tried to see the best in everyone and the silver lining in everything. 

Notice I said used to. 

I'm not so chipper and positive and optimistic anymore. I don't necessarily look for the best in everyone.  And I sure don't see the silver lining in much of what goes on in life anymore.

The opposite of that mean monster's story has been happening to me over time, and I'm turning into someone that I feel disappointed by. 

I want to see the best in everyone. I want to give them a chance, and to even develop a friendship with them. Yes, I make friends with people, but I sure don't give people second chances or try very hard to see things from a different light when I see them do something that I don't agree with. 

I want to see the silver lining in life. I want to take everything, the good and  the bad, and find a positive, happy takeaway. Something that leaves me feeling as though everything has meaning in it, and it's not all gloom if things don't appear as we want.

A couple years ago, my friend lent me this book by Ann Voskamp.

One Thousand Gifts

I was going through some awful stuff with N's father, and I cried all the time. It felt like life would never be okay, N was going to be scarred, I was scarred, the only thing I had ever wished for my entire life was never going to happen, my life had been ripped away from me, torn into shreds, and then went up in flames.

I was devastated. One Thousand Gifts was hard for me to read, but it helped me. I tried to actively look for the gifts in every day, in every moment, and it helped.

Grad school has been a nightmare for me. I'm still not even sure how I made it this far into the program, but it has taken it's toll. Anymore, I feel like all I do is moan and complain and whine about how it's so hard, and the program is awful, and I don't want to continue the program, and the professors are awful, and on and on and on. 

I have a hard time seeing the positive in anything anymore. Grad school took me and turned me into a monster! 

Well, after B sent me that photo (of the mean monster) and after I had sat and thought about it for a while, I decided enough was enough. The things and people in my life that make it hard, whether it's N's father, mean professors, difficult assignments/exams, long distance internships, anything, I am not going to let it take control of me. 

I will not be the mean monster's doppelgänger!! I will be me, and I will be kind, and thoughtful, and generous, and caring, and loving, and accepting, and turn-the-other-cheek-ing, and look-for-the-positive-ing, and silver-linings-exist-ing!

I'm going to journal my own thousand gifts, every day, every time I see one. Whether it's iridescent suds in the sink, fluffy toddler bed-head, a friend's laughter, a feeling of energy, satisfaction of being able to drive home, or the solid thwack of a shoe on a soccer ball in the yard. I will see the positive, and I will look for and hope for the best in everything.

And when I write my thousand gifts, I'm not going to stop. I'm going to keep on writing them.

When it's summertime..

M's Topic: the one thing I am looking forward to the most this summer...

This post is going to have to be short and sweet today, due to the impending horribleness that is proving my competency via an oral exam this week. I have much to do yet to prepare!!

Since I've been drowning in studying for my competency/departmental exams/boards/whatever you want to call them for the last 6 weeks with few breaks, I've got a pretty one track brain when it comes to the topic M gave me. The one thing I am most looking forward to during the summer is having NO WORK/SCHOOL RESPONSIBILITIES. Ugh, I can't even EXPRESS how much I can't wait to be done writing papers, preparing for exams, preparing for presentations, making lesson plans, agonizing over the correct procedure for a clinical bedside exam, coming up with enough appropriate questions for my supervisor when asked, "do you have any questions?"

I know that as soon as I get through my departmental exams and the speech praxis, the answer to M's question will probably change pretty quickly (e.g. spending all day long with Magoo, going to see family that I haven't traveled to see in 5+ years, camping, spending weekends with friends instead of my computer, the list is potentially endless). For now, I just can't wait to be done with studying, preparing for exams, and STRESSING over all of this stuff!

Wish me luck and cross your fingers and pray Pray PRAY for me this week and especially Friday morning!!!!

Story Time: One Dog Night

I'm not reading a book every week this year: see the date? It's January 17th, so we're almost into week 3 of the new year, and this is my first book, ALTHOUGH it WAS an audiobook. However, I'm still literate. :) (Although I don't exactly read books that encourage a lot of thought.)

I spend a lot of time in the car, so I've gotten into audiobooks lately. A little library nearby has a pretty decent selection of them, and I've also enlisted the help of the super sweet librarians. I'm working my way through a series of books by the author, David Rosenfelt, about a New Jersey defense attorney, Andy Carpenter. They're extremely sarcastic and each book is really unique, but ties past characters into each new story really well. I love all of the characters and I'm going to be really sad when I finish the series and there are no more to read! (I'll probably send harassing emails to the author, trying to heckle him into writing more books!)

I just finished One Dog Night, which is book 9 out of the 13 book series, and I tell you what, any subsequent audiobooks are unlikely to hold up to my standards now established by my newest favorite comedy/crime/courtroom series! This one has a thumbs up from me. :)

DRWP Employee of the Week: A Look at 11th Grade Composition

I've been searching for my undergraduate GPA like a crazy person for the last several weeks, and while searching, I found a few gems from middle school and high school. It's very nice when people share, so here's something goofy from my junior year of high school. 

DRWP Employee of the Week

When I was fifteen, I obtained my first, official, honest, paying job. It was a summer job right after school was out for the summer in eighth grade. I was so proud. However, that didn't even compare to the pride I felt at the end of the summer when I was hailed as the employee of the week at the Deep River Water Park.

My brother Josh had a job there as a member of the maintenance department, and I knew exactly what I wanted my first job to be when I had my fifteenth birthday that June. I talked my brother into bringing home an application so I could sign up right away. I became an official member of the Deep River Water Park Maintenance Department exactly five days after my birthday.

On the first day of work, I came in at ten 'til seven in the morning, wearing my brand-new, extra large Hawaiian shirt and my blue pants, and met my awesome new boss, Keith the Mullet Man. I quickly became aware of the fact that my boss was the coolest department boss in the entire water park. He took me on a tour of the entire park, explained the different sections, showed me where to find brooms, Pik-Sticks, and skimmers, and showed me how to find my way back to "Keith's Workshop." He even gave me my own DRWP water bottle. 

He sent me to Court 1 for my first day, which was the envy of most of the maintenance workers, because of all the tips that could be received for sweeping up napkins and French Fries. All I had to do was weave through the tables flipping and scooping with my little broom and my dustpan on a stick, with an occasional run through the front bathroom to make sure that no natural or unnatural disasters had occurred during the fifteen minutes since I had checked last. I had mastered the art of flipping and scooping by the time the park had been open for ten minutes.

When lunch break rolled around, I had no idea. Josh came to get me for lunch at twelve, and I experienced my first artery clogging water park meal. I began with a cup of greasy chicken bites, and ended with half of a funnel cake. This finished, I heaved my unsettled stomach out of the chair in the break room with the fuzzy TV screen, the fly trap that wasn't trapping any flies, and the popcorn machine with the two week old, fly infested popcorn, and went back to work sweeping up napkins in the food court.

At three o'clock, I bought a strawberry smoothie with a food token and came into the break room where a stimulating newspaper question and answer game was beginning. After smoking Keith the Mullet Man, Brian the Clueless MIT Student, and the rest of the maintenance department, we went back to clean the bathrooms one last time before our shift was over. My first day at the Deep River Water Park was over.

The second day, I worked the hill. On the hill, I mastered the art of Pik-Sticking rather quickly. This required muscles in the left arm to carry the five gallon bucket, and index finger movement on the right hand for controlling the Pik-Stick. The general concept of the Pik-Stick was to squeeze a handle at the top of the stick, and a claw on the other end would clamp on whatever trash item was being focused on at the moment. After picking up this particular skill, there wasn't much I couldn't accomplish.

The summer continued with eight hour shifts starting either at seven a.m. or two p.m. My personal favorite was the night shift, because much more meandering was tolerated while Pik-Sticking. Also, Keith was usually grouchier in the mornings, because Rob worked the morning shifts. Rob was the only person I ever know who could actually drown the Dolphin, which was an underwater vacuum. Either that or he would drop a lawn mower in the Lazy River. The entire maintenance crew would wait in anticipation in Keith's Workshop before the park opened to see what kind of accident Rob had that morning. Even though Keith was usually mad, Rob did liven up the mornings. It was during a morning shift in August that I became aware of my acquired position as the employee of the week.

The employee of the week was a position that was revered by all the employees in the park. First of all, it was a great honor to be chosen as the employee of the week, because that meant that I would have my picture with the assistant manager posted on the employee of the week bulletin board. Next, I received free food tokens from Christ, the assistant manager of the park. Food tokens lasted a long time for me since I was friends with the workers in Milo's, which was a restaurant above Keith's Workshop. Also, I received an Employee of the Week certificate wishing me a "Splashtastic Week" that was signed by Keith, the manager of the entire park, and myself. However, the greatest honor was yet to come.

The greatest honor was parking in the employee of the week parking place next to the break room. Employees of all departments envied the employee of the week parking places since it was a mad race each morning to get a parking place in the cramped employee parking lot. The employee of the week parking place had a special sign posted above it indicating exactly who it was for. That person was me. I had dreamed of the day that we would be able to drive the blue whale of a Bonneville to that parking place and pull into it instead of driving on. I never believed that I would really be able to do it, and it was exhilarating when it actually happened. When the car stopped, Josh left immediately, but I had to sit and savor the moment. It was truly fabulous. I was so proud when the other employees be can arriving and drove past me to their insignificant parking spots without employee of the week signs.

That entire week was wonderful. I was held up in a glorified position as employee of the week and people recognized me from my corner picture with Chris, the greasy assistant manager. My certificate was posted in Keith's Workshop until the end of the week when I took it home and posted it on my own wall. I spent two minutes savoring the employee of the week parking spot every day all week. Altogether, it was my greatest achievement as a working citizen of the United States of America, and I was very proud. It was an incredible achievement for me, and I was extremely triumphant.